Thanks for making me wonder.
I never intended on having an ode to my mother on the internet for all to see, but I wrote this thing for mother’s day yesterday with the sole aim of making my mother cry (it worked) and if I just post that then it will save me boatloads of time, so I’m thinking the pros outweigh the cons on this one. I got her permission and have decided to accept the five minutes of cringing for the sake of convenience, so here we go. You’re not my mother so you probably won’t cry, but I don’t mind. I wasn’t writing it for you anyway. Airplanes used to pass over our house in Quincy all the time. They’d snail across the blue canvas and leave faint white lines, marking their trail only temporarily. I’d be in the backyard, playing hopscotch in a little pink dress, and you’d be right there with me while I explored my own habitat. We’d hear a plane fly overhead. I would instinctively look up and you’d say “Look, do you see the airplane? I wonder where it’s going…” I didn’t know very many places yet, but that didn’t stop me from pondering the question. I would do my best to speculate aloud and you’d never tell me I was wrong. My tiny brain would consider the plane, and the people it held, and what those people would find when they reached their mysterious destination. The idea excited me: that plane could be going anywhere. Right now there’s a plane passing over our house here in Ireland. That happens sometimes. You’re not always around to ask, but I’m now old enough to ask of myself – “I wonder where it’s going…” When that happens, it reminds me of the places I will go. It reminds me that there is a whole world out there, and I’ve explored but one corner of it. Places exist where people are different and life is different and I get to learn for myself whether or not different means better. You asked me where planes go and put something inside me that will never be still. A curiosity, a wondering, a restlessness. A belief that just because there may never be a clear answer doesn’t mean it’s not worth asking the question anyway. I thank God you did that. I hope it means that I will never just ‘settle’. If ever I’m tempted to not fully participate in life, or to take the easy way around, I will look up at the sky and see a plane. I will say in my head and in my heart – “I wonder where it’s going…” Then I’ll find out where planes go. I’ll chase every last one until I find what I’m looking for, and because of you I’ll know it’s worth doing. You’ve made it possible for me to spend my life firstly wondering and then learning. That’s more than I ever would’ve known to want. I’ll find out where the planes go and I’ll be back to tell you all about it, don’t worry. Happy Mother's Day. Thanks for making me wonder. HS
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